Monday Morning Movie Trailer Mayhem

Yesterday was the super bowl, which means tons of overly priced commercial spots for the world to enjoy.  And of course, mixed in with those commercials are trailers for some of this years big budget summer blockbuster films.  Of particular interest yesterday were three specific movie trailers where we were shown some brand new footage from some heavy hitting geek film properties.  I'm speaking of course of Star Trek, GI Joe: The Rise of Cobra and Transformers 2: Revenge of the Fallen.  Let's take a look at them and pick them apart, shall we?  We'll start with Transformers 2.

 



 

Admittedly, not bad.  The trailer for Transformers actually does a decent job of showcasing some cool stuff we can expect to see in the film.  There's a bunch of large explosions, some wicked looking giant robot fights, and a very minimal amount of Shia La Beef and Megan Fox.  All in all, it could have been a lot worse. 

 

Plus, we see Optimus Prime getting punched in the face.  That's pretty damn cool if you ask me.  I'm assuming the giant robot riding the unicycle at the very end is The Fallen (the films new villain).  I can't help but wonder, why a unicycle?  Sure, it may look cool and all, but what happens when the robot stops moving for a second.  With nothing else to balance on, does he just fall over a lot, or is he like a shark and he has to keep moving constantly?  Enquiring minds want to know.

 

Then there's the new Star Trek Trailer:

 

 

 

Most of the footage in this trailer has been seen before, but there was also a bunch of new stuff in there  for fans to drool over.  We get to see Kirk in a bar fight where he looks a little beaten up afterwards, we get to see more of the super laser weapon that the main villain will be using to destroy planets, and we even get to see the very first time James T. Kirk and Dr. McCoy meet. 

 

And am I mistaken, or are they both drinking when they meet?

 

I think of all the summer films, this is the one I'm the most excited to see.  Aside from it being Star Trek, and therefore inherently being something that I love already, it just looks really good.  Both of the trailers that we've now seen for the film makes it look exciting, action filled, yet maintaining the classic Star Trek feel.  I could be wrong and the film may end up being horrible, but somehow I doubt that.  I think the new Star Trek movie is going to rock our socks off, and I can't wait to see it.

 

And now (shudder) let's take a look at GI Joe: The Rise of Cobra

 



 

As you're all by now well aware, my fears for this movie are plentiful.  I fully expect this film to suck beyond all possible levels of suckiness, but I am trying to be fair here.  There were a few things in the trailer that I actually liked, and so I'm going to break down my thoughts on this trailer by listing both the things that I thought were good and the things that were bad.

 

The Good: 

• Christopher Eccleston looks pretty awesome as Destro.  I don't even really care that he probably won't be wearing the mask for most of the film.  He's a great actor, and it looks like he'll be playing a great villain.


• Sienna Miller as the Baroness.  Super hot and deadly, just like she should be.


• Watching the Eiffel Tower fall.  It's a pretty cool looking effect, and knowing that Cobra brings it down is really sweet.


• Snake Eyes doing a flip over a flying car.  Sure, it's over the top and ridiculous, but it looks awesome and come on, what kid didn't pretend he could do stuff like that when they were playing with his toy back in the day?


• Dennis Quaid as General Hawk.  Excellent casting.  He looks perfect for the role.

 

The Bad:

• Those god awful black suits they're wearing.  They make them look like the damned X-Men.  It's stupid.  They look cooler earlier in the trailer when they're just wearing regular army fatigues.


• The scenes with the flipping and the jumping through the train windows.  Retarded.  Those black suits are supposed to be these speed suit type things that allow the GI Joe team to run at speeds of about 50 or 60 mph and they can leap hundreds of feet or something.  Stupid stupid stupid.  This is not a superhero film.  It's a military film.  Your soldiers shouldn't be jumping through speeding trains or flipping down the street in slow motion.  Only Snake Eyes can do shit like that.  Everyone else should be firing lots of guns and occasionally punching people.  That's it.


• Where the hell is Cobra Commander?  The film is called Rise of Cobra, right?  So why is Cobra's leader MIA?  Why does the trailer make it look like Destro is the main villain?  I love Destro and all, but the main villain should be Cobra Commander?  Not having him in the trailer makes me worry that he looks totally ridiculous or something, and the movie studio realized that so they on purposely left him out.  It's the only solid explanation I can think of.